skyscript.co.uk
   

home articles forum events
glossary horary quiz consultations links more

Read this before using the forum
Register
FAQ
Search
View memberlist
View/edit your user profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
Recent additions:
Can assassinations be prevented? by Elsbeth Ebertin
translated by Jenn Zahrt PhD
A Guide to Interpreting The Great American Eclipse
by Wade Caves
The Astrology of Depression
by Judith Hill
Understanding the mean conjunctions of the Jupiter-Saturn cycle
by Benjamin Dykes
Understanding the zodiac: and why there really ARE 12 signs of the zodiac, not 13
by Deborah Houlding

Skyscript Astrology Forum

Last Resort Synastry

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index -> News, Notices, Books, Links
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Ficina
Member


Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 1807
Location: Kent, England

Posted: Sun Sep 05, 2004 11:36 am    Post subject: Last Resort Synastry Reply with quote

Hi guys,

Have been reading the Novile thread and couldn't resist resurrecting this little piece of satire, which I posted on another forum a couple of years ago. Just a bit of fun Cool

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin....
You know what it's like. Your eyes meet across a crowded room. Your
heart flutters not a little. And in no time at all you're involved in
animated conversation and a passionate embrace. But, hold on - you're an
astrologer remember, so the first thing you do is grab his birth details
(no, no, you can grab the other bits later!) and rush to the computer.

"You want to look at his chart?" Do I heck! Who cares about his chart?!
No, what I want to see is the ***Synastry***

Hmmm, a few nice contacts here and there but..oh Sad a few not-so-nice
contacts also, but never mind, we can ignore those for the moment and go
back and check them when the rose-tinted phase is over (in about 3 - 6
months' time on average). However, no Mars/Venus contacts crying

Not to worry, we've got the Composite to look at yet - and yes, there is some juicy stuff there but...still no sign of that elusive Venus/Mars aspect. Nil desperandum! Time to consult Draconics and Midpoints...

Draconic-Draconic, Natal-Draconic, Draconic-Natal. His midpoints to my
natal, my midpoints to his.... Damn! We now have virtually every planet
and point in both charts aspecting each other, in some instances several
times over. But still the Mars/Venus eludes us....

Time for desperate measures. I reach for the top shelf and find my
trusty guide, "Very Obscure Aspects" (or "Last Resort Synastry"). And
there at last, as a footnote on page 69, I find it! The
trisepticnovilovidovisextile!! YESSSSSS! Blissful rapture! My Venus is
triseptilovidoviwotsit his Mars! Oh dear, it's 3 degrees wide of exact Confused

But I don't care! It still counts, so he must be the love of my life. I knew it. We will live happily ever after Very Happy

ok, you can wake up now Wink
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
pat557



Joined: 26 Oct 2003
Posts: 40
Location: California USA

Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 7:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ficina,
That is GOOD stuff.

I think this needs to be RE-POSTED on every other "astrology" forum out there. not that it would change a thing; How dare you dash their hopes! you Bad bad person, you!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Pete



Joined: 29 Apr 2004
Posts: 301
Location: Kinnelon, New Jersey, USA

Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 12:14 pm    Post subject: Re: Last Resort Synastry Reply with quote

Quote:
Time for desperate measures. I reach for the top shelf and find my
trusty guide, "Very Obscure Aspects" (or "Last Resort Synastry"). And
there at last, as a footnote on page 69, I find it! The
trisepticnovilovidovisextile!! YESSSSSS! Blissful rapture! My Venus is
triseptilovidoviwotsit his Mars! Oh dear, it's 3 degrees wide of exact Confused
But I don't care! It still counts, so he must be the love of my life. I knew it. We will live happily ever after Very Happy


Yeah, and to add rapture to bliss, this incredible aspect occurs in *just* the right harmonic to make it work --the 137th! Tongue Out Lala Happy
I remember you posting this, you cynic! Very Happy

Nice one though, Fi!
==
Pete
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Ficina
Member


Joined: 26 Mar 2004
Posts: 1807
Location: Kent, England

Posted: Sat Oct 16, 2004 5:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks, Pat, yes I am baaaad Twisted Evil

No, not a cynic, Pete, a satirist please Cool But I am impressed how you got the number 137 out of that conglomeration Laughing Are you sure it's not a bus number? Lala Happy

Cheers!

Fi
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index -> News, Notices, Books, Links All times are GMT
Page 1 of 1

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
. Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group

       
Contact Deborah Houlding  | terms and conditions  
All rights on all text and images reserved. Reproduction by any means is not permitted without the express
agreement of Deborah Houlding or in the case of articles by guest astrologers, the copyright owner indictated